Just checked the calendar today, and realized that today is my one-year anniversary. Last year on January 25, 2005, I was laid off of my full time job as a web designer and began my profession as a full time jewelry designer and business owner.
Looking back made me realize how long it really took me to transition from unemployed to self-employed. The actual act didn't take long at all. The last day I walked into the office, my boss met me at my desk and asked to talk to me in his office, a half hour later...I packed up my few belongings and left that office forever. In that instant, my part time occupation of business owner and jewelry designer, became my full time profession. But it took even longer for my mind and heart to fully realize what had happened.
For the first week, I was in total shock. Even though I had been unhappy and had dreamed about quitting and taking my business full-time, it's still very disconcerting to walk out the door as an employed person one hour and walk back in unemployed an hour and half later. I had been working since I was fifteen and had never left a job where it wasn't on my own terms. It was strange not having a place to go in the mornings. I spent more time daily with my co-workers than I did with my own husband and all of a sudden, those familiar faces were gone. After the shock wore off, my husband and I discussed what should happen next. For him, there was no question about me running my jewelry design business full time. The writing was on the wall he said, this layoff was just a sign that I needed to go ahead and pursue my dream. (I had in fact gotten a wholesale order for some jewelry on the day I got laid off...talk about signs!)
So I got to work, booked some local shows, got more wholesale accounts and went about the task of building a full time business. It took friends and some family members a bit of time to get the fact that I was going to do the jewelry thing full time. Through the next three or four months, I had to tactfully turn down the many job leads well-meaning loved ones threw my way. Strangely enough, my mind took even longer than my family to catch up. When people asked what I did, I said that I used to be a web designer and that I now made jewelry. When family and friends needed some help during hours in which most people would be going to work, I volunteered because "I didn't have a job anyway". The very last time I made a comment like this was in the late summer just as I was preparing for a two day show over the weekend. My twelve-year old god-daughter had volunteered to help with the preparations and with the actual show. When I made the comment about "not having a job", she looked at me and said, "But you do have a job. You're running a business." Funny how it took a twelve-year old to point out the obvious. After that, I made a concerted effort never to make that statement again.
As I write this, I realize the moment that my mind finally caught up to my heart and reality. James and I was at his boss' annual Christmas party last month. After the usual round of introductions, one of the female guests asked me what I did for a living. Without a beat or hesitation, I said "I'm a jewelry designer and I run my own company". Within ten minutes I had a small crowd around me as I explained my jewelry and talked about the local retailers that carried my work. By the end of the evening I had passed out almost all of my business cards and for the first time I felt like what I had been since January 25, 2005.
A jewelry designer and business owner.
